wat is friends like.....

anyone can tell me, wat is frens like.............
becoz of some words of my frens...........i think abt it all through tis week.....
i thinkin whether wat they tell really rite and occurs around me..........
frens......tis word like it means some teasing for me.......i duno y.....

i try to feel wat friendship is like......
friends come and go in my life,
they don't even stop to care and c wat happen around u.....
they didn't ask abt the things occurs in ur life....they even not to take attention abt tat.....
some will say frienship is jz a relationship that exploit to each other,
we try to take advantages on each other,like care and warmth......
can u even noe who is main character in ur life, and who is the oni side character?
sumtimes feel tat i'm not really exist in the circle i should be in.....
i try to be hard, but the more i wanted to be, the more i getting hurt,
when u get hurt, there was a scar on it....
it was to hard to cover, the scar jz bring me to the shadow.....
i dun wan that the scar that bring pain to me, i reali cant stand for it.....
the shadow lead me to be offensive.....

i thought if i can pretend to not see it or hear it, i will feel better,but i'm wrong.......
i try to feel it wiv my heart, den it will more even be better.......
ictry it hard, but can u all pls change ur style when i'm talk to u, dun show the expression tat i not really care wat u talk, i cant stand it anymore, or dun even answer my question very unfriendly,
i talking good to u, and nt argue wiv u.....
and dun even judge my opinion, i can tell u i hate it if u do like tat, u hurt my feeling very deep....
i dun wan to be the one who do the stupid changes, if u can do it, i oso cant earn a good relationship wiv u all,
plz everytime take care abt ur talk behaviour, i dun wan to be hurting by u all....
i oni gt a heart and there was ady a scar that deep enough for me tat cant cure even till the day i die, i dun wan to get more scar in my heart and hurt.......
is tat happen, i realli will becum desperate.........i try very hard be4 to let the scare in my heart get cure, bt it cant......i becum more deeper and deeper to hurt my heart, evertime i try hard to pretend tat is nothing to me, there was more hard for me.....
pls change it, i reali need u all too care abt me, even "him" oso......try to learn how perceive it pls....if i cant do it, y cant u all......

happy birthday ~

today my class hav a lot of ppl's birthday
our class celebrate the birthday together wiv dem
but when i sing the birthday song
i think of u
my heart is so pain, like tis never happen to me before
i thinkin a lot about u today
i think tat how r u now?
did u happy in the place u get to be there now?
do u happy?
wat was there hav? is there good enough to u?
i so curious abt there-heaven
i think do u hav frens there?
but the pain make me gonna cry, i try to no bother about it and continue to prepare my for my exam
den i think do u noe tat i miss u a lot here?
i reali miss u a lot like u never been left me......
but it's jz a fact tat u hav leave me.......
anyway,today's ur birthday
so " happy birthday " to u
and hope u received my wish wherever u r.......
i luv u so much.......

忘不了の痛 ~

在你离开的那一杀那，你已经改变了我的一生..........
你带给我的创伤和伤痕是永远都无法抹灭的
你知道那到底对我来说有多痛吗？
我当时痛到快窒息了，痛到快麻痹了
你带走了我该有快乐的生活，带走了我该有的爱
你走了我的快乐只是虚假的，那都是强颜欢笑，而并非想像中快乐
你走了，留下给我的阴影要我如何释怀
我曾埋怨过你的离开
没留下任何一句话的就离开了
我以为时间久了，伤痕就会慢慢的淡去
我会渐渐的复原，不会再痛，再伤心，再为你哭
可是我错了，每当我想起你，我还是不自觉的留下了眼泪
我的心还是会痛，我以为我把它处理的很好，其实并没有
你还是存在于我的心里
你是我不想碰触在我心里的一个缺角和痛处
我每次告诉自己无所谓的，你一定可以撑过去的
可是我并非想像中的坚强，其实我还是会痛，会伤心，会想念着你
假如时间能在倒流，我多希望我对你好些
不顶你的嘴，你不允许的我都遵守，不让你伤心和担心，多听你的话，做个孝顺你的女儿
多希望你能疼我多一天，爱我多一天
这样我就满足了
我总觉得你给我的时间太短了
不过一切的一切都太迟了..........

充满杯面的日子~

现在发现原来学院的生活好难过啊!我最近的生活都被杯面给充满了，肚子饿了杯面就出现在眼前，当功课很忙时，杯面在次出现，有事无事就吃杯面就对了.................
每天晚上忙到好迟，每当眼睛快闭上时，就会很努力的把眼皮撑开，好累，快让我休息睡觉吧!

missing u ~

my dearest.........,

i miss u so much.........like i can feel u wherever i go..........
i can feel u alwaez beside me........like u alwaez do.............
i feel i wanna touch u and c u again......................................
but it's too far for me and so difficult to me........................
i reali love u like u love me before........................................
everytime when i feel tired and desperate.........................
i will think abt u and keep remembering ur face ..............
i can even remember u vividly in my memory..................
now,i really miss u a lot..........................................................
do u miss me like i do?...........................................................
i hate u tat u leave me jz like tat..........................................
without any words left...........................................................
but i'll still love u and miss u whenever u go......................




the one tat
love u alwaez...

moody~

i din smile,not means i'm not happy
i din angry,not means i din hav emotions
i din cry,not means i 'm not hurt at all
i drops a tears not means i'm sad,maybe tat i m too happy
i smile not becoz i'm happy,jz thinkin tat how fool m i
although i had stop crying ,but my tears still dropping non-stop
wat to do~

wat i hav think~

i hav think a lot laz nite............
happy or unhappy is juz a rythm of life...........
if life is a important meal,
den love is jz dessert.............
if life din hav all such thing....
sad , happy , dissapointed , hurt , desperate...........
den the life will becum black and white ,
not tat colourful as u think........................
if wan colourful ur life den let it be in all bad and best situation....................

hate ar ~

tis the fiz time i feel reali tired until hav the feeling of crying..........
i'm reali tired now............stress ar............reali tired.........who can keep holding me den from fallen.......i hate tis life now........although it is freedom but my soul is on the way to dying........so desperate ...........who can rescue me............i reali need it.............the tears drop non-stop and the heart keep bleeding...........reali pain.............although hav a lot of frens , but the one reali understand ,and noe u is not occured............the one u reali need ,the one can always stay by ur side is not longer belong to u.........and i oso not longer belong to one part of dem.........i'm the only one stand out of situation..........do u noe the feeling.............stand out of everything happen surrounding.............i pretend to dono abt it...........choose to not listen abt it.............choose to be "blind"...........not to see wat reali happen surround me...............but sometime i still think whether is tat "worthy" for me.....but sumtime there was sumthings out of wat i'm thinking.............i jz wan peace..............if giv me a chance again...........i think i wont go through tis path...........it's too hard for me.............but i'll try to do my best..................."gambateh"

broken heart~

wat become of a broken hearted?
who can answer it?
izzit all my wrong?
tell me abt it..........if falling love wiv u is a fault.......den wat can i do ? stop it ? if it can be....tell me wat to do........i beg u.pls...........if u r hurt den i will hurt more den u hundred , thousand times..........tell me pls........whose wrong izzit ? is tat mine ? or your's ? or the god ? or sum other people else ? if u wan me to forget u ,pls treat me more cruel tat u can ? den i will hate u more tat wat u wan.........the cruelest from u, the better for me............
" どうして君を好きになってしまったんだろう？
どんなに時が流れても君はずっと
ここにいると、思ってたのに
でも君が選んだのは違う道"

if u stay happy , den i will feel blissful too............
i reali love u so much.........
i will send all my blessing to u..........

LOVE~

wat make me luv u ?
y do i luv u ?
izzit worthy to luv u?
i keep giving wat u want ,but wat u hav giving me is nothing ,nothing.....tat is wat u treats me....

With a calm face you lie
And then laugh until you feel sick
Saying, “Let’s have nothing but fun”
Feeling blue over desiring the impossible
Everyone is seeking peace
You’re struggling, but you’ve had enough
So now you’re chasing love's shadow
Boring days suddenly shined
Since the day you appeared
You made me think that loneliness and torment were ok
Through painful times and healthy times,
Stormy days and sunny days, let’s walk on together
’m gonna tell you the truth
I chose a secretly painful path
and you come to support me
You’re the only one I can call "friend"
Fake displays of strength and avarice have become meaningless
You've made me love you since that day
When I’m free, with time to spare, there’s no life in being alone
Just a little more
*Don’t you give up*
Oh don’t leave me-no matter what
If the cruelty of reality tries to tear us apart
We’ll be drawn more closely to one another
Somehow, somehow, I have a feeling we’ll be able to stand firm
Every day banalities quickly began to shine
You stole my heart that day
You made me think that loneliness and torment were ok
Stay with me, stay with me
My baby, say you love me
Stay with me, stay with me
Don’t leave me


it's so meaningful....tat is wat u giv me.........tats wat u do to me........izzit tat i deserve to had?..........

life~

when u can live forever
wat do u live for?

try to think it..........

life~

when u can live forever
wat do u live for?

friends tat i hav no meet for so long..........

laz yesterday,i'm so free so i think a lot tat day........suddenly i remembered my frens, whom i didn't c for so long.......den i feel like i wanna contact bec..........so i go to friendster and keep searching for their profile.....and god bless me.........i got it after i searching for so long and so excited abt tat....but,there is sumthin tat i realize after i found tat..........i realize the ppl tat i noe before for so long had change........i cant expect tat.........whether is a good or bad changes,i oso donno.......i feel like a lot of changes can happen in a short time..........i feel tat sumtime not even changes can happen in ur life in sudden,maybe tat a decision making tat can change ur whole life.......no matter how old or how young u r........maybe there's the fate u hav too choose the way to cross it over.......maybe after u reali cross it over den u may hav success like no other can go along it and u can find ur hapiness by ur own..........maybe tat time is too rebellious or too young......so u even think abt the results if doin tat........but i found tat sumtime he is very stubborn.......hehe.........ur blog a bit shocked me......but anyway i wish u to be happy and blissful person for wat u hav own now.....reali happy to meet u both at the sametime.........hee....:)

痛到窒息了 ~

虽然像似放弃了
但心里还是一直在痛
很痛，很痛，痛得快喘不过气
痛得快窒息了
我一直保护着这颗心
不让任何人侵入
不让任何人伤害
可是这一切的一切在遇到你后一切都变了
你闯入我的生活
让我没有喘息的余地
我恨你
非常的恨你
你剥夺了我一切的自由
你自私的让我的心只属于你
让我再也没有爱上别人和接受别人的权力
你让我的心死心踏地的爱着你
我快为你所给的一切而窒息了
放过我好吗？？

unlucky day~

my second skol day start , but i hav been meet two weird lecturer................haiz~one of dem like to asking non-stop y?y?y? and another 1 the tutorial time she ztil keep talking non-stop..........izzit she hav a remove control in her body............although we all try to stop/pause her ,but she still keep talking............= ="............haiz~and today when i get out from the cab ,sumthing unlucky happen to me............my sandals broke and i hav to naked my leg and wake bec home~~ so paiseh ler..................and today i get teased my frens............wat happen to my world.................haiz~.........i wan be the lucky and not the unlucky................wat the hell goins on..............

wat a unlucky day ~

my second skol day start , but i hav been meet two weird lecturer................haiz~one of dem like to asking non-stop y?y?y? and another 1 the tutorial time she ztil keep talking non-stop..........izzit

my fiz skol day ~ start to bankrupt ~

my skol day start today................today i go "johnny" wiv my frens.............and i hav use a lot of my money........wuu~............goin to bankrupt soon.................wat to do?...........new sem hav to buy new book again.............haiz..............god can u pls make me more wealthy.....haha..........i want to be a rich gal.................den i will didn't hav any problem dy..............i oso wan to be more clever.............den get full "A" in my exam too.................but i think i hav think too much.................haiz~.................y nowadays all things make me so dissapointed and desperate............in my education ,relationship ,and friendship................wat happen yah?!...............start from now i will start to change my attitude and how i treat ppl..............becoz tat is no idea at all...............i force by all things happen around me , i hav no idea.............i will go through it by myself....and i will be more strong...................haha.....

tired of tis life ~

laz nite,goin out to feeling cafe too celebrate birthday jia yen birthday............after celebrate it ,went home den shu mun and cc had slept at our house............den before sleep i had a chat wiv shu mun.................den we sleep late,den today i hav a tired day....................but sumthin buzzing me around....haiz~so tired ar.............keep waiting aqnd waiting , can u pls tell me wat i've get from u...........pls tell me wat u want and pls dun waste my time.............i reali tired of waiting u................if still like tat i will choiose to giv up......................tomolo start my skol life again......second sem comin and i getting to die soon....................